Champions and Cuckolds

Its Monday and I'm still recovering from a head cold.  As a famous actor in a relatively famous movie once since, "There is nothing more tired than an old queen with a head cold."   And there I am.

So, let's recap the weekend.  First, we saw Barney Frank in his own chillingly "frank" way (get it) discuss the uselessness and purposelessness of the National Equality March on Washington.  What's sad about this is not only the fact that he is himself a Senator and the first openly gay man elected to Congress, but also that he just sounds so damned bitter about the whole thing.  I wonder if he's upset because it wasn't his idea.

I think he missed the point.  In a community that faces as much derision and placative behavior as we have of late, we need opportunities to show ourselves in unity.  It doesn't happen that often and why not use the opportunity to fight for our equality as the opportunity to also build some community?  Its sad to me that he decided to play Grampa Washout, but then, the decision is his and as one TOQ (Tired Old Queen) to another, I understand.

Its hard to get excited at that age.  As death looms over us, it is difficult to understand the hope and energy one can derive from large gatherings of the clan.  Been there, done that.  Hell, you probably knitted the first t-shirt.  This is, of course, all ageist bullshit and Barney Frank needs to wake the hell up.  There are plenty of people out there much older than he who are doing magnificent things.  A great line from another, well mediocre film, needs to be uttered here: "Bitterness leads to botox,"  and frankly Senator you could use a touch-up. (playing into standard stereotypes of beauty - yes, I get it)

Then there's the President.  Ah, Mr. President, thank you for coming and speaking to a bazillion dollar a plate dinner for the whitest and most elite GLBT (the T here is questionable) organization in the country.  Thank you for once again telling us how you are going to lift "Don't Ask, Don't Tell,".....again.  Thank you for telling us how much inequality isn't okay (unless, of course, we are talking about marriage).  Thank you for telling us, once again, that you would be our champion (yet, we see you using your legal prowress to fight for DOMA and its applications and little effort to push ENDA).

I don't really want to seem mad here.  I'm not usually an angry kind of person.  I am, however, starting to get a little hocked off at the condescension.  Does he really think we don't notice?  Does he really think we aren't paying attention?  Does he really think we'll be willing to take the crumbs he gives us and count our blessings?

Yep.  He sure does.  Why not?  We have so far.  And as much as I think Barney Frank's negativity makes him sound like a crotchety old asshole, I understand his point about a march not having as much impact as folks lobbying congress-persons would.  We want to send a message, but that message has to be somewhat more personal, more in-depth and from the heart.  It has to be directly to those representatives who "represent" us.  That's how we impact change.  Get 200,000 people to start shouting at their Senators and Congress people and then we can start moving the mountain.  I think that's what Grampa Frank meant.  It's not quite how he said it, but I think this is what he meant.

The rally was beautiful.  It was a sparkling day and by The Advocate (the official magazine of beautiful, gorgeous, greek-Adonis like gay people everywhere) the estimated attendance ranked around 200,000 people.  Not bad queers, not bad.  I hope we will use this momentum to move things forward; To use our voices to really speak our truths.  I hope we will use this momentum to acknowledge that GLBTQ issues are issues that affect people who are poor, people who are racial/ethnic minorities and the aged, the disabled.

 

The Cosmic Question...

As someone who is epicene in nature, I am drawn to the ideals of feminist thinking. Not man-hating, angry, or destructive feminism (though I have been all three at one point or another), but feminism as the most excellent bell hooks would describe it:

"Feminism is a movement to end sexism, sexist exploitation, and oppression."

I would add, for the purposes of this blog, my own tag line to that, which would be, "in all its various forms."  This includes lesbian, gay, bi, trans and queer peoples too - it wouldn't be terribly feminist if it didn't.

All the big, scary sociological terms that frighten the hell out of everyone like heternormativism, homophobia, sexism, racism, classism, ableism, etc, are the kinds of things I want to address here.  No fear though.  I want to make sure that these thoughts are done in a easily accessible way.  Someday we'll all figure out that until we are all equal, we are all in some way held back.

This blog is in NO way anti-male nor will it ever be.  That would be un-feminist.  It is about understanding the gendered world in which we live and breaking the chains with which any dominant form of societal organization burdens all people.

I hope you'll join me on this journey as I study my gendered life and this gendered world in which we live.